Food for Thought: What if Field Guides were Restaurants?

Establishments, past and present, reviewed by "De Gustibus"

Perennial Favorites

Pederson's - This venerable upstate diner still offers old-fashioned home-style cooking. Midwestern style: very bland but nutritious. If you liked "Fargo", you'll enjoy the chow here. Warning: Don't order anything off-the-menu.

Pederson's East - That pleasant old diner (now under family ownership) has been re-opened as an up-market cafeteria. Portions are larger, but food has gotten more pretentious and is beyond chef's abilities. Don't be fooled.

Golden Café - The first cafeteria-style eatery, serving a plethora of dishes, all arranged conveniently for your pleasure. Very popular when it opened. Marred by dim ambience and inexperienced chef. Help yourself!

National Gastronomic - An overblown food emporium, catering "power meals" to the inside crowd. Great variety of dishes available, including all sorts of unfamiliar foreign foods. Biggest disappointment: Meals are prepared by ten different chefs, leading to acute indigestion.

Gala Openings

Grogg's All-American - Here's a joint where the owners, a consortium of investors, got in way over their heads! Many different regional courses offered -- and the pastry cook is excellent -- but it can't compete with its betters. Eat elsewhere.

Focus on Food - An object lesson in high-tech food processing . . . . It don't work! Resembles a dim sum palace run by non-Chinese -- too many unappetizing side-dishes served in unattractive, color-clashing decor. Franchises available.

Sibling's Own - The ultimate, 5-star "Shopping Mall" restaurant. Sprawling, expensive and endeavoring to serve everyone. Very popular -- note photos of celebs in window. However, this critic finds food is not prepared with care, and certain essential ingredients are lacking for full flavor.

Underground Gourmet

Coe's La Nostra - Ah, just like your favorite neighborhood pizza parlor. No frills (forget the pepperoni), but ingredients authentic and tastes good! A quick, balanced meal that won't empty your wallet. "Yo, gimme a slice."

Out-of-Business

Huffmann's Home Cooking - Old-time cuisine prepared by an expert. Irresolvable difficulties: few daily specials and nobody liked German food. Auf Wiedersehen.

Collin's Cookhouse - Late, unlamented hash-house down by the tracks. Now remembered chiefly for innovative toothpicks stuck in the fried chicken wings . . . . you sure needed 'em.

Pugh & Eichelburger's - Formerly, a quality steakhouse with top chefs - meat was terrific! Sadly, poor venue -- uncomfortable seating, etc. -- ruined dining experience.

Chanticleer's "Original" Audubon House - Very first establishment to offer "nouvelle cuisine" -- Cajun-style, but the cooks had never been near New Orleans. Menu was in incomprehensible patois, and the food looked a whole lot better than it tasted! Where's the Bromo?

The Bull and Bear - Tried to pass as an English pub, but strictly "take-out" from White Castle. Ixnay on the burgers -- ("10 for a dollar").

The Three Amigos - Early attempt at Latin American "fusion" cooking, but overall result was more like meltdown. Menu didn't correlate to dishes, while platters so small that food tended to slop over. Too much moonlighting in the kitchen! Opening under new management soon.

Briefly Noted

Smoke's Family BBQ - Food not bad, but small portions.

MacAlden's - New regional chain. Every choice imaginable but portions tiny. May not survive conglomerate takeover.

First Foods-R-Us - Mini-meals for tots . . . . icky!

Recommendations

What can I say? The homey old family restaurants and roadside beaneries have all been torn down - to be replaced by chain restaurants and fast food joints . . . . "Taste's crisp", all right, but little flavor and less nutrition. Eat at home!